Cellar spiders are small arachnids between 2 and 5cm, with thin grey or brown limbs. They inhabit corners of bedrooms and bathrooms, where they spin webs in order to catch their favourite food - dust. The low nutritional value of dust is what lets these spiders keep their trim figure and light footsteps, qualities that are highly valued in cellar spider society. In times of great cleanliness, such as spring cleaning, it is important to sprinkle a small amount of dust for the cellar spiders to prevent them eating each other.
Cellar spiders spawn at light levels below 5, wherever there is a corner and at least one block of air. If killed, they drop 5XP and have a 20% chance to drop Cobweb. However, cellar spiders are more valued as pets, being one of only a few animals allowed by almost every landlord. Furthermore, this species is known to be easily trained in a variety of tricks, such as sitting, standing and rolling over. A typical cellar spider can recall about 7 tricks at any one time.
Average Lifespan: 2 years
Approx Weight: 0.0004 kg
Cuteness: 58
Wits: 37
Top Trumps Rating: 65
Silverfish are in fact 90% mercury. The name of this insect is derived not from the metal but from the fact that silverfish are always the second best animal in the room. If you ever find yourself in a room with a silverfish, odds are that you are superior. Unless there is also a goldfish.
Silverfish live in colonies of as many as you can find, plus a few more. They live in showers, sinks, and dinner plates as soon as you are about to serve food. Fuelled purely by spite and a need to be inconvenient, they seek out whatever location they are least desired and congregate there.
Average Lifespan: 8 years
Approx Weight: 0.020 kg
Cuteness: 34
Wits: 19
Top Trumps Rating: 45
Weevils wobble but they never fall down. There are over 40000 species of weevil and all of them live in my apartment, however the most radiant of all the species is known as the Clarence Weevil. Identifiable by its brillant rainbow wing cases and melancholy singing voice, this insect is one of the rarest in existence and both individuals currently live above my desk.
Weevils as a species hit the peak of their popularity with the online flash game Bin Weevils. The game served as effective PR until its closure in 2021, after which point weevils quickly fell out of popular favour.
Average Lifespan: 2 years
Approx Weight: 0.003 kg
Cuteness: 95
Wits: 51
Top Trumps Rating: 71
Fun facts!
